Misery loves company.

I need one person. Only one.
I need someone who is my other half.
I need someone who cares.
I need someone who loves me inside and out.
I need someone who won't hurt me.
I need someone who is always on my side.
I need someone who won't use me.
I need someone who asks me what's wrong when I'm sad.
I need someone who will sit with me when I cry.
I need someone who won't make me only forget, but make everything better.
I need someone who won't leave me high and dry.
I need someone who can love with their heart and soul.
I need someone who wants to be with me as much as I want to be with them.

I need someone.






I need you.

Like a hard candy with a surprise center.

I'm gonna push on in this bullshit causing, drama infested, ignorant inhabited, violence generated, love rejecting, self-centered world for many more years to come.

They can't throw me out yet.

With friends like mine, the world seems like such a brighter place. Almost a calming, peaceful, caring place where I actually matter.

And that my friend, is what real friendship is.
None of that stabbing in the back bull crap.
We don't roll that way.



~Dedicated to Tyler Ballew, Ayah Hamza, Regina Panelo, Chris Pecci, Brielle Liebman, Amberly Gott, Jacquelyn Escange, Makenzie Escagne, Emily Spoon <3

Give me anything.

I woke up this morning with a smile on my face.
It's up to you to decide whether it's real or fake.

In my head, I see you all over me.

In my head, you fulfill my fantasy.


(;

I'll leave the light on if you promise you'll come home.

I'm using this blog to take some of my old Livejournal posts and sort of talk to myself from the past. To sort of "show myself" where I've come and what has happened from them. I know it seems weird, but I think it seems cool. I wasn't very happy, so none of these really are gonna be sweet and shit.

March 2nd, 2009
"I would really love to get what I want one day.
I would love for someone to love me back.
I would love to have more than one reason to smile.
I would love to do more with my life.
I'd love to have something to look forward to every day.

But no.
I guess I'm glad, in a way.
Hearing you say that you don't care and that you don't give a damn about all the hearts you've ever broken, really put it into perspective for me.
Maybe you weren't thinking when you said it,
or maybe you still don't realize how many times you've hurt me.

It's hard to say I love you, but it's easy to realize that I really do care about you."


God dammit, Molly. What the hell is wrong with you? Take a chill pill and calm the fuck down. You're okay. Trust me, everything is fine. I really don't know why you were so pissed. No one was even talking to you. Just stfu, girl.

February 7th, 2009
"I just feel like I don't matter anymore :|"

Oh, Molly. I remember this :/ It's okay. You do matter. You always have. Distance is just getting the best of you.

January 29th, 2009
"Even though saying goodbye is the hardest thing for me to do,
saying "I love you and I miss you" and hearing you say it back
always seems to make up for it."

OMG. I remember that. It always made me happy.

January 24th, 2009
"I love the little things you do.
The ones you don't even realize.
I love your smile.
How you're so happy when you see me.
I love your hugs.
Every time you open your arms to hug me, I get excited.
I love your scent.
It's like a drug to me.
I love your eyes.
I think I could stare into them for forever.
And the nights when we talk until 2 am.
Having you talk to me until I fall asleep.
Your voice is so soothing and relaxing; I can 't help but feel warm and safe.
Saying goodbye to you is the hardest thing I have to do.
And I feel as If I've said it too many times."

So right. Yep yep yep. Memories.
No more saying "goodbye".
Only hello hello hello (:

January 18th, 2009
"I'm proud of who I am.
I miss my past, but wouldn't go back.
I'm scared of the future, yet I'm looking forward to see what is coming my way.
I'm happy to say that I have great friends, and little, close to none, enemies.
I haven't made many huge mistakes in my life that can't be fixed.
& I plan to keep it that way.

I'm not like most girls my age who change themselves to fit in.
I don't spend hundreds of dollars on clothes that are "fashionable".
I won't give everything I have to the first boy who comes my way.
I don't need other's opinions to feel good about myself.
I don't go around putting myself down to get compliments from other people.
& I'm not going to complain about how my life sucks.
Because it doesn't."


WORD GIRLFRAN. WORD.

January 17th, 2009
"Goodbye;
forever.


Things will never be the same.
:/"

Biggest lie ever. Everything is the same and you know it won't change.
Stfuuuuu!

I don't how I'm meant to feel anymore.

When do you think it will all become clear?
'Cause I'm being taken over by the fear.


It's too easy to lose yourself in High School. It's too easy to forget about everything and jump into the pool of young teenagers running a muck and being immature. It's too easy to forget that some people aren't really the same as the front they put up in front of others. It's too easy to lose trust. It's too easy to pick the wrong crowd. It's too easy to forget the person you really are, and begin to turn into the people you're around. It's too easy to give 2nd chances.

It's hard to jump out of the drama that comes with everything. It's hard to be the person you want to be. It's hard not to give into peer pressure.

But it's even harder to walk this world alone when your friends have given up on you, and you're played by the people you've left them for.

"Before you ask which way to go, remember where you've been."
-Alex Gaskarth

Say something you know they'll wanna hear.

Maybe they'll listen up if you speak loud enough.

You say "I love you", I say "I'll love you forever."

"So in love, imagine 4 people in your life you'll truly love. Each for every letter in love. L-loser, O-overly done, V-very wrong, E-everything you ever wanted. But sometimes God has this weird way of messing with the spelling of love. So, if you're lucky your E may just follow your L. No matter what, it'll be an adventure you'll never forget."


-Tyler Christian Ballew <3

You say yes, I say no. You say stop, I say go, go, go.

I found this quote from a blog I never posted. I really enjoy it.

"Life is like a book in many ways.
You can read it to the end, or stop in the middle. If you like a page, bookmark it as a memory, and if you come to a page where you don't like, just turn the page and move on."
-Molly Kaye Escagne

Then you're the fool, I'm just as well. Hope it gives you hell.

Now you'll never see
What you've done to me
You can take back your memories
They're no good to me
And here's all your lies
You can't look me in the eyes
With the sad, sad look
That you wear so well.


Btw, new Glee is gonna be bad-ass (: Last night's episode was so good! I'm so excited for it to be back :D I missed it! Looking for next week's episode. It makes me so happyyyyy.
Oh, I got my drivers license today!!! Now I can drive (: Wooooo!

You got me. (Hey, jealous)

I feel like this one person keeps trying to make me jealous. I don't really appreciate it, you know. I could care less about all the crap you've done. I'm happy your life is just going so perfect right now, and you're just so happy about all of this, but it's not making me feel any better about mine. It's just... like... I don't know. I really am happy that you're happy, but I don't want to only hear about it. I don't want you to rub in my face that you're getting exactly what you want.
You're just getting all this attention, and everything is great.
There are so many things I just want to say, but first of all, I'm being considerate. I just have no one to talk about this to, because everything you tell me is a secret basically. If I tell that one someone, you're gonna be hella pissed. And you know, I'm not one who blabs all my friend's secrets. Especially when I know it will hurt them.
You tell me all of your secrets and other's secrets. I'll give a few of mine, but there is no way I'm dishing out all of my friend's secrets to you. You better be glad I'm not a bitchy friend.
I spill one secret to the right person, and I ruin everything you've got going on right now.
But I would never ever ever do that. I'm not THAT mean.
Hahaha, you're not reading this because you don't know about it. I just had to vent a little.
I love you and all, but this is ridiculous. If you're trying to make me jealous, stop.
Just because it's working and it's not making me happier for you. It's really not making me any happier about myself either.
You know what I want, and you'd take it if you could. That's a sad, sad thing.
I don't talk to you enough for you to ever know I feel like this.
Oh well, I'll live.

Kthanks.

Oh, and I love my best friends too much to hurt them. Be happy.

Sooner or later, I'll need a saviour.

It might be the hardest thing on earth, but it could be the most beneficial. It could cause the most pain, but it could also be the key to your happiness.
It's better to live out a the pain now, for your happiness later than to live with a numb feeling to get rid of all the feelings you could be feeling.
It's harder to give up on the things that make you the happiest, but are the worst for you. It's usually worth it though.
We don't know it, and we don't want to believe it.
The idea that we can't live without something or someone is more of a mindset than anything else really.
It takes time, but it gets easier.
I've come to this realization quite recently, and I will be listening to my own advice this time.

"It won´t ever change if you want it to stay the same
I really hate it but I know it´s hard to choose if you´re chained
And when it´s all you control cause you´ve got nothing less to hold
You´re getting tighter and tighter it´s getting harder to let it go"

Are we denying a crisis or are we scared of admiting it?

As many times as I can say "What I don't know won't hurt me"...
When I find out, it kills me.